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        butterfly05  39, Female, USA - 8 entries
    21
    Sep 2006
    7:44 PM EDT
       

    This is my 1st entry, it would be imposible to tell u everything, but in time u'll see where im comming from. Right now, im living with my boyfriend who i have been with for about 3 months, i've been around him pretty much 24/7 since the first night that i met him, which scares me, cause my last relationship was the same way, and as soon as i fell head over heals for the guy, he broke my heart. maybe i try too hard, i don't know, i just like to make the man i love happy, and this one doesn't seem to appreciate it. he doesn't compliment my cooking, or seam to awknowlege that i cleaned the house. ( which took 3 days... it was a mess!) i'll write him little notes like once everyother week, just letting him know that i love him and appreciate him, and he will read it and throw it away, with out so much as a kiss or hug. i know it sounds like he just doesn't like me, but he's the one that said the htree dreadfull words first, it took me, almost a month after that toi say it back, now it's like it means nothing. some times he is real nice, and other times i feel like he hates my guts! i'm also the one with the major income right now... he gets money from his parents every once in a while, but i pay for alot. The worst part is, i'm a stripper, so my money doesn't come easy, i have to go into work every night, get naked, and let 60 year old men grope me, and tell me they want to taste my pussy. I'M ONLY 19!!! that shit is scaring me for life!! nowonder i don't have much of a sex drive.oh, G2G
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        DancingButterfly  48, Female, New York, USA - 13 entries
    21
    Sep 2006
    7:30 AM EDT
       

    I haven't been very motivated this week. Probably due to the lack of client work for the group recently, and the fact that there's no longer a bus stop right in front of my apartment that takes me directly to the subway station. Have been working from home 2 days this week.. =p I was pretty productive on Monday and actually made 2 full meals though!! First time in a year I think, since I started traveling to Minneapolis last summer. =) The dropping of oil price and rally in the stock market have not been helping our business, so people have been "borrowed" by other groups to keep chargeable. As of last week, my options are Michigan, Atlanta, and some other unknown city in midwest. Pretty exciting isn't it? I am still in the state of hating travel since the last engagement, so hopefully I don't get to be shipped out again too soon...
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    1 comment(s) - 06:40 PM - 09/26/2006
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        Talacia  35, Female, Australia - 51 entries
    21
    Sep 2006
    10:09 PM EST
       

    supp? sum gurl named ashleigh died at our skool last friday, so now everyone is going to the funeral today... i guess its sad, i didnt know here, but its still depressing watch people walk around mouping around, and bands on their arms in memory of her... maybe i should go?? but i dont think her friends would appriciate it if i just turned up.... anyhooo, getting ready for the formal YAY mwazh
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    3 comment(s) - 07:48 AM - 09/28/2006
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        jleigh09  39, Female, United Kingdom - 35 entries
    21
    Sep 2006
    9:12 AM WET
       

    looking forward to today going shopping need to get out cnt sit in all day i'll go mad. oh my son is started to wake up so i dunn ow far i will get with oyu today journal. i am shattered had a really bad night last night i think tyler is coming down with a cold as he keeps coughing i willl have to keep an eye on that. anyway i will have to get back to you later tyler needs his bottle and a nappy change. bless him he's smiling at the moment while watching his hands and sucking them everything goes in his mouth at the mo he is getting to that stage when he is grabbing things and noticing things more.
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        DancingButterfly  48, Female, New York, USA - 13 entries
    21
    Sep 2006
    2:02 PM EDT
       

    I love the quote today! "People often say that this or that person has not yet found himself. But the salf is not something one finds, it is something one creates. - Thomas Szasz, "Personal Conduct," The Second Sin, 1973." It is true that I can get all caught up sometimes on finding "what I really want deep down" or "how I really think of this and that subconsciously," I forget that living the moment and experiencing life in various aspects are actually ways to define who I am and who I am going to be. Though at this rate, I might just end up being a housewife who cooks a lot, with part-time work as party promoter.. =p Umm...need to think about that~~~
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        Lissy  50, Male, New York, USA - First entry!
    21
    Sep 2006
    11:28 AM EDT
       

    There isn't really that much to know about me and it's my first onlive diary...
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        cyberlullaby  37, Female, New York, USA - First entry!
    21
    Sep 2006
    10:07 AM EST
       

    Tell me this in the dictionary the following definition is what love is. 1. A profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person. 2. A feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection, as for a parent, child or friend 3. Sexual passion or desire 4. A person toward whom love is felt; beloved person; sweetheart 5. A love affair; an intensely amorous incident; amour But it seems like the world just can't get the fact that love isn't just between a man and a woman, but also between two women or two men.
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        Jane  58, Female, New York, USA - 50 entries
    21
    Sep 2006
    11:06 AM EDT
       

    Had a great day at the pumpkin patch today. Spending the day with a group of 5 year olds can be an eye opening experience. Once I got over the snotty noses I was much better. All in all a good time was everyone.
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        SkaterKitty  35, Female, Texas, USA - 10 entries
    21
    Sep 2006
    8:12 AM CST
       

    Yeah today is a Thursday. The day before our game against Dublin. Which I'm really not looking forward to because their band was 16th in all-state last year which isnt really saying much but the thing is is that they beat us by far. And this year our band isnt all that good because we have a bunch of freshman and sophomores that think they can run the whole show. And thats whats making us all suck. And yeah. Well at least my boyfriend (Carlos Figueroa) is coming to see us. And if we suck, that will make me feel better I think. lol. But yeah. :) I just cant wait for this thing to be over with. Oh yeah. And then on Saturday, I have another Upward Bound meeting which I really hope its not as boring as the last one was becuase that really sucked. But yeah. I'm going to go. byE! from me!! Rose Lewis aka Skater Kitty
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        Cumber  36, Female, Texas, USA - First entry!
    20
    Sep 2006
    4:22 AM PST
       

    Ok so just a few days ago my boyfriend of three and a half years decides that he doesn't knows what he wants anymore....devastated i called my good friend alicia and told her what happened. she tells me that i can't be in that kind of relationship and to try and end it or something. so the next time my boyfriend and i talked he had said that he just doesn't see the diffrence between us being friends versus us being a couple....that was pretty much a slap in the face to me. so i said that we weren't a couple any more and ended it saturday night. it was so hard for me to start telling people the bad news...none of my friends knew highschool without jared and i being a couple. it was really devasting to alot of different people. my mom didn't find out until sunday night....even then i couldn't tell her face to face, i texted her and told her what had happened. everyone that i told got the goosebumps. no one even saw it coming. it was hard-hitting news. my own brother didn't even believe me at first. but once he finally believed me he was behind me 100%. all of my friends have really. my cousin, when my sister told her, started to cry. everyone was hurt, not just me. that following monday at school was really awquard. he wasn't even acting like any thing happened that weekend. he still expects us to be really good friends and hang out and stuff,and i would LOVE to, but he doesn't understand how hard it is for me to retain myself from hugging him or kissing him. i love him so much. i just dont understand. so im trying not to talk to him or hang out with him, you know? just give him some space for right now, but its hard because he is everywhere
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